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    Learn to Love Yourself ...

"We cannot love ourselves unless we love others, and we cannot love others unless we love ourselves..."

~Thomas Merton

"The more loving we are, the more naturally harmony surrounds us..."
~Marianne Williamson

"When one is a stranger to oneself then one is estranged from others too. If one is out of touch with oneself, then one cannot touch others."

~Anne Morrow Lindbergh

"To value yourself is to love yourself. It is really from here that your love for others comes. If you value yourself a great deal, you actually have something to give to others."

~Deepak Chopra

"Validate yourself first, then you'll have the tools to validate others. We all need validation!"

I love the song "The Greatest Love of All" performed by Whitney Houston.
It has a powerful message and I truly believe that the most important lesson we have to learn in life is to learn to
LOVE (I know it sounds corny - but it is the truth). When we learn to truly love ourselves -with our qualities and our weaknesses- we learn to love others better; we learn to be more tolerant, more understanding, more patient, more compassionate. We learn that others are not so different from us; we can learn a lot from them and become better persons. We learn to forgive ourselves and others. We learn that we are all connected and we can find God inside of us and in others. I believe love connects us to God. But even if you don't believe in God or a superior power, only when you learn to love - you find happiness. I'm not talking about self-centered (or narcissistic) love; I'm talking about love that starts within and spreads to everyone around us.

Loving is not an easy task; some people die without learning what true love is; without learning to love unconditionally. One of my greatest teachers (besides my Mom) was Leo Buscaglia; but there are hundreds of extraordinary teachers out there, who have either written great books or have been our teachers, priests, rabbis, parents, friends, etc. If you look you will find; but always search within (through prayer, meditation, intuition) and the help will come.

Learn to know yourself. Discover who you are. It is a wonderful challenge!

The following are some of the verses of the song "The Greatest Love of All":

"I decided long ago never to walk in anyone's shadow.
If I fail, if I succeed,
at least I lived as I believe.
No matter what they take from me,
They can't take away my dignity.

Because the greatest love of all is happening to me.
I found the greatest love of all inside of me.
The greatest love of all is easy to achieve.
Learning to love yourself, it is the greatest love of all.

And if by chance that special place
that you've been dreaming of
leads you to a lonely place,
find your strength in love."

Source: Words by Linda Creed, Music by Michael Masser; Copyright 1977 Gold Horizon Music Corp. and Golden Torch Music Corp. The popular version of this song was performed by Whitney Houston. Before that, George Benson did a great version of it too.

Some great books (amongst many others) are: "Creating Love" by John Bradshaw, "The Power is Within You" by Louise L. Hay, "Don't be Afraid to Love" by Susan Polis Schutz (a book of poems), "Living, Loving and Learning" and "Loving Each Other" by Leo Buscaglia, "Love is Letting Go of Fear" and "Love is the Answer" by Gerald G. Jampolsky and Diane V. Cirincione,"Life is for Loving" by Eric Butterworth, and "Unconditional Love" by John Powell,S.J.

Louise Hay writes in "The Power is Within You":

"Unconditional love is the goal I think we have come here to attain. It begins with self-acceptance and self-love. You are not here to please other people or to live your lives their way. You can only live it your own way and walk your own pathway. You have come to fulfill yourself and express love on the deepest level. You are here to learn and grow and to absorb and project compassion and understanding. When you leave the planet, you don't take your relationship or your automobile or your bank account or your job with you. The only thing you take is your capacity to love!"

I found the following paragraphs in the website

"I wish you the ability to develop the light that is within you, to strengthen your spiritual faith, to help your faith in yourself to grow and thrive.  You have the gift of self-sufficiency, and the possibility of growing into a person who is strong and able.  But may you not grow too strong, though, so that you reject the help and love and caring of others who wish to be there for you.  Balance your strength with your needs and the needs of others to be helpful and to show their caring."

"I wish you the power of a perspective that allows you to see the beauty of the darkness, no matter how threatening your current situation, or how uneasy you may feel.  There always is light for us to access, whether it be the light of God or the light of a close friend, or even the light within ourselves that is the power and the strength with which we've all been blessed to one extent or another."


Here are some beautiful words written by Tom Walsh (from with his permission:

You're a Beautiful Person!

I wish that I could tell every person that I meet that he or she is a beautiful person - and have them believe it. I wish I could look them in the eyes and tell them of their beauty and have them accept the words for what they truly are - the truth, plain and simple.

You know what I mean, don't you? You and I both know that most people will deny their beauty, expressing what they feel is modesty or humility. It's easier for us to be told that we're talented or intelligent - our own beauty is something that we don't want to face.

You could help me to convince people of their innate beauty. You could agree with me in an effort to reinforce the message. You could give a few specifics to illustrate just what we're talking about when we say the person is beautiful. You could reassure the person that I'm not saying it to flatter or to try to win the person over or get something out of the person, but just trying to express in words the beauty I see when I look into that person's eyes and see the human being there, the person who gets happy and hurt and who laughs and who cries.

You can help me by reminding the person that beauty isn't about comparing ourselves with others, but about the part of us that shines when we love others and love life. It's not all physical and it's not all spiritual, but a tender combinatioin of all that we are.

And when that person says: "No, not me," you could argue the point and ask him or her not to talk down about him or herself, to admit to the beauty that's there, to accept it, to thrive in it. Because you know just as well as I do that this person can hurt his or her own self-image and feelings by denying the beauty.

So I ask you: Please help me to convince people of their own beauty. Will you do that? Thank you. And we'll start right here, with you: YOU'RE A BEAUTIFUL PERSON.

The rest is up to you

"Your will to love yourself is as strong as your will to survive and is not imposed on you from without. Loving yourself is an intrinsic part of one's being. You will not be whole until you allow the love you need to flow from within... Love yourself for your own sake!"
~Adolfo Quezada

"At some point it's your responsibility to put an end to the past. By letting go of the past and fully living in the present, your heart is healed -  because you love yourself the way you are."

~John Morton

"Self-love begins with self-respect."

"Our capacity to love is directly dependent upon our ability to love ourselves with a mature self-love."

~Eric Butterworth

"Learn to love and respect yourself so much that you won't allow other people disrespect you."

~Miguel Ruiz ("The Four Agreements")

"If you aren't good at loving yourself, you will have a difficult time loving anyone, since you'll resent the time and energy you give another person that you aren't even giving to yourself." 
~Barbara De Angelis, (Relationship Expert)

"The art of being yourself at your best is the art of unfolding your personality into the person you want to be..."
~Wilferd A. Peterson*

"Respect yourself, trust yourself, be kind and gentle with yourself... create the kind of self you will be happy to live with all your life!
~Wilferd A. Peterson*

"Learn to love yourself and to forgive yourself, for only as we have the right attitude toward our selves can we have the right attitude toward others."

~Wilferd A. Peterson

* From "The Art of Living" by Wilferd A. Peterson - Copyright 1960, 1961

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